It all started 1 and a half month ago when I read about John McCain. Critics was saying that he is not fit for presidential candidate considering his old age, and also he being a cancer survivor. He had skin cancer known as melanoma. According to wikipedia, melanoma is a malignant tumor which are found predominantly in skin. It's one of the rarer type of skin cancer but causes the majority of skin cancer related death.s The symptom is a dark bump kind of skin. Googled the picture of melanoma and it struck me right away!! I was shocked because i have a "similar" bump at the back of my left thigh. This patch of discolored skin has been there, well, I can't remember since when. I bet it's there for at least 4 years or more. Throughout these years, it doesn't bother me at all so naturally I have never paid attention to it, never thought about what's wrong with this little blacky patch. I was worried within seconds once I realized this could be potentially skin cancer. CANCER! I could be paranoid but it somewhat looks similar to some of the melanoma pictures.

Feeling extremely uneasy, i wish i could see a doctor right away. However, in the US, professional service normally requires an appointment in advance, unless it's an emergency. It's not like in malaysia where you can simply walk in. Moreover, I haven't seen a doctor for my 6 years in the US. I have no idea how my insurance works, which doctor to go to etc. After spending some time understanding my insurance policy, I need to decide on doctor. Choosing a doctor wasn't that straight forward either. Dermatology is a broad term. Different dermatologists have various focus on plastic surgery, liposuction, acne, skin cancer etc. I "yelp" some of the dermatologists around south bay and called them to schedule appointment. A few of them were fully booked and the next available time slot was 1 month away. For some reason, I feel more comfortable with a female, rather than a male dermatologist. I thought dermatology (think about beauty) doesn't go right with male. In the end, i decided on a female doctor at California Skin Institute in San Jose. The appoinment was scheduled a week later.

Indeed, cancer is dreadful as I vividly remember how my uncle suffered from lung cancer and passed away. I gotta say ignorance is bliss. If i don't read about John McCain, skin cancer will never ring a bell and I can sleep sound every night. I talked to my friends about this, and they assured that i will be fine. Well, I can't be that "lucky" right? I have never felt so eager to see a doctor.

I saw the doctor a week later. First diagnosis, she didn't conclude anything. But since that bump has been there for such a long time, it's probably not urgent at the moment. She gave me some oilment cream to apply on it and schedule another visit 2 weeks. It didn't show any improvement when I went back 2 weeks later. She then decided to do a biopsy, basically removal and examination of a sample of tissue. I had local anesthesia and she cut into that piece of skin to get some sample for diagnosis. With stiches, the whole process took about 10 minutes and relatively painless.

While waiting for the medical report, I can't help but keep thinking what if the result is positive. Needless to say my mood was bad. I totally understand why some people are so afraid of medical check-up. My father is probably one. None of us can persuade him to do one. Many people choose to ignore the problem, or potential problem, until they show up, but by then it may be too late to salvage. Any good method to coax your stubborn old man to have medical check?

So I got my report this week. Man, called me paranoid but it was pretty intense waiting for the doctor to go over the result. It came out as some sort of chronic skin inflammation. I was confused. What inflammation? This thing doesn't bother me at all. It's like a dead skin, like i don't really feel a thing even you poke a needle on it. Anyway, i am all happy now! The doctor injected some steroid on it and I will see her again in 3 weeks. If this persists, she suggest another biopsy, just to be sure. My insurance is actually pretty good. Each visit co-pay is only $5. However I am still waiting for the insurance bill. Not sure if this whole process will cost me an arm and a leg but considering health is priceless, it's totally worth it. At least i can sleep better now.

Back to the question, if the report turns out to be positive, then what? I think I gonna go back home, get a dog and a motorcycle. What are you going to do if your are diagnosed with cancer?

A side note, a stock (brlc) i bought went bankrupt this week. I lost 98% of what i invested. Luckily it wasn't that much of money. I consider it 破财挡灾:)